playing catch up ... as always

It is so hard to find the time to catch the blog up, yet it is so important. How many times have I said some variety of that same thing??? Ok so here is the run down from the last two months or so ... {beware its a beast!}

Nate & Audrey: Well we have been doing and experiencing all that I will detail out below with the kids. In addition to that I have spent a good deal of time cleaning, and cleaning again, and then cleaning some more, the front door recently became revolving and not even to people we know! Yep it went back up on the market. Thankfully now it is under contract so I am packing and packing again and packing some more. All while I run studio stems and utah bride blog. Nate, well he has been fixing this and touching up that to make the house appealing, and it worked cause it sold. All while coaching and traveling for wrestling and running first hand. We arent busy at all!

We recently went on a little spring break trip to Palm Springs to see my dad. My favorite part {besides seeing my dad} Sunnylands!

The landscaping and architecture of this unique and grand estate designed by quincy jones for the annebergs speaks to my design soul. there usually is no place like home and after a few days of vacay {especially with 4 kids in tow} I am usually ready to come home, not this time. I didnt want to leave. It just felt so good and Nox suddenly slept so well and it was so pretty and the temp was so perfect and and and it was HArd to come home!

Storie .... OH MY SWEET STORIE. Life is growing her and showing her new things. She has been a busy bee but unfortunately her 'rents havent documented her quiet as carefully. Slap on the hand! She recently finished up short course season with the UVRAYS and is taking a swim team break as we anticipated a move. But will start back up here soon with a new team in the summer. She also played spring soccer. Unfortunately due to injuries and being out of town she was unable to make it to about half the games but every game she got to she scored a goal at, and sometimes more! Violin is still progressing forward and so is that new teenage frustration that comes with partially clipped wings and strong desires to soar. Oh the joys we are about to embrace. She is a huge help to me with the babe and around the house and boy is she loving her "new" room in the basement since her brother lost the privilege and had to move upstairs! She better enjoy it while it lasts and before we move into an even more cramped space!

Stock ...

Wrestling, more wrestling, wrestling again, and then some nox, and then some wrestling. Luckily the season recently came to a close. FINALLY!!!!! He has been everywhere near and far it seems. Gone EVERY wknd! Last wknd in April he took State in his weight class and division for both Greco and Freestyle. On occasion he is here and spends time with Nox that is if he has the patience. He has the desire but it usually doesnt last long. Our newest endeavor ... a contract. To do his best on and off the mat. It has been a good tool. But things go as they do with boys ... Now he is prepping for western regionals in June. And I am glad the end of tournament season brings both him and his father home.

Saylor..... much of our lives have actually been about her as of late and I am happy to say not for traumatic reasons. She has had great thing after great thing occur in her life. The highlights ...

Steve young ski classic! 

This happens to be my favorite image from the classic. It is of Saylor and anna talking. I adore anna, I just have this strong admiration for her and her constant smile and up beat attitude. I love that they are on the same level and that a certain spirit exists between them. 

 This is Lincoln Dewitt - an olympic American skeleton racer, he loves saylor. Heck he loves all the WAS kids! He calls saylor bob. and saylor calls him abraham.

Speaking of skiing, for those of you that dont know, through the season a few cameras followed us around on the slopes and at home. The show turning point produced an episode on WAS and peter, this included some amazing footage with our little skiing nugget in it. She is just the next ski film star if you ask me. Did not get a chance to see it???? watch now!!!

What a tear jerker right? Yes i know i said some profound things. And i guess what? I really really meant them. I hope you felt them. And to all those that contributed to the fundraiser to help this program back in march ... THANK YOU! I hope this film gave you warm fuzzies that made your donation more than worth it! Not to mention that pretty much all of you won something!

We are hoping to raise some funds over the summer to buy saylor her very own set of outriggers .. its the last piece of equipment she doesnt own for herself that will allow her to ski whenever and where ever she wants ... so want to contribute? message me!

Saylor also danced int he TDC spring concert with a few of her "special" friends. Including gracie!

This was incredibly touching for us as a family. The special needs class performed to the song "firework" by katie perry. The lyrics really speak to what it might be a better perspective to self reflection as a special individual. The best part was the sudden movement of an entire audience to clap in beat and cheer these kids on and then a standing ovation. When both nate and I are crying you know its special!

Saylor also turned 9 recently! she wanted a play date with mom. So we started out her bday weekend with not going to school {sluffers} and sleeping in! Then off to the movie {chimpanzee} which included some popcorn, a giant cookie, and some root beer. Followed by a nail apt and some shopping! Then to see our friend kicker at me in mind for boxes and shoes, home for a much needed nap and chinese food for dinner.

The next morning {april 28th} was her birthday and the boys were up in davis county at the state wrestling tournament so we headed to the zoo with angel hands and met up with Ireland!

Perfect zoo weather, not too hot, not too cold and a bit of sun! Animals were vibrant and friends abounding. Then off to watch stock wrestle in his final match to take first and finally to her favorite place to dine, cheesecake factory! {saylor should hang with her aunt heather more often!} not to mention a little more shopping before hand. This girl started the day with only 1 pair of shoes that fit her braces and finished it with 6! Sometimes we go an entire year without finding shoes that will fit her braces that we can afford. Small miracles, all 6 of them!

And then there is baby NOX

whom turned 6 months and then 7 months and now almost 8 months!!!!!! I cant keep up with the kid. He refuses to stop aging. He is hitting some milestones but missing the mark on some. Sitting up extremely well and nearly ready to stand too but not crawling. He just wont. And as for sleeping. We are not much better off than the last time i touched on this topic. My hardest kid thus far in regards to sleeping! by a wide margin. He is the biggest turd of all time in the night. He can outcry any power a mommy might have. Even several hours worth! He is starting to make sounds and not just noises, unfortunately for me its "dada" not "mama". who is doing all the work here anyway?

But he is pretty darn cute. And those lashes? I know I know! I never get sick of people and not only people but strangers telling me that he might be the cutest baby they have ever seen! What a flirt this little man is! My latest obsession with him ... how he monkey curls his arms and legs around me when I first pick him up from a nap.

well that is the gist ... not the full .... but just the gist. Next time I post we likely wont be living in Provo. Interested in where we are going and what we are doing? Stay tuned!

Have boxes? call me or text me. want a kitchen table and chairs, call me or text me. Want a great bookshelf? call or text me. want a window AC? call or text me. Want a computer cabinet? call or text me. Want anything else I might have except my kids? You never know .. i might be willing to part, I am a de-junker. Call or text me.

Ever wondered how to support Saylor???

As many of you know a highlight in Saylor's life is skiing. Its a big deal to her and to us. A magical gift of movement and wonder that leaves her on a high that we cant seem to create any other way. Something seemingly impossible creating a wave of fresh cold miracle!

You may also know that the program that makes this possible is Wasatch Adaptive Sports @ Snowbird. Without them we could never provide this experience for her, nor would she be as good as she is! For many years now they have been so generous in what they have done and made possible for Saylor, endlessly blessing her and our family.

Every year in March they host the Steve Young Ski Classic as their big fundraiser for the year. The success of this event is crucial to the vitality of this program! Not only does it raise the funds to make this program capable of blessing Saylor and others like her it provides the participants of the program a fun ski race to participate in. Something Saylor anticipates all season long!

Last year she was so excited to go and suddenly a few days prior went into kidney failure and landed herself in the hospital. I was devastated and she was too! It was a break your heart kind of week, all I could think of was that she would miss this ski race that was so important to her. Well another year has come and gone and next week {cross my fingers} she will get to participate again!

EVER WONDERED HOW YOU COULD SUPPORT SAYLOR? We have never really been the kind of family to put our hands out or ask for financial support but if there was a program that we felt strongly about this would be one of them! So here we are ....

In conjunction with the fundraising surrounding this event Wasatch Adaptive Sports will be doing a raffle drawing on Monday March 19 2012. All proceeds will go to WAS as these items have all been donated. What is in the pot to win? Things like ...

2012 winter week lodging at iron blosam lodge @ snowbird!!!!
Ski & Snowboard clothing & accessories {top of the line!}
Dinning gift certificates
Spa & Salon services
and so much more!

I happen to have raffle tickets and Saylor would love to sell you some in hopes of supporting the program that supports her! You can get 3 tickets for $5!!! YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE PRESENT TO WIN!

If you are interested, please email me asap with the amount of tickets you would like and when you want to meet up, or mail up, or exchange up funds as well as what name, phone number, address, and email you want on each raffle ticket. {studiostems@gmail.com} You can also FB comment or message me!

Regardless I just want to say how much I appreciate all the support we get on Saylor's behalf. We know how immensely blessed we are to have her and to experience the miracles we do everyday, and often times those miracles happen through our experiences with those around us. Thank you for your support!!

The Lion of March

I figured as March roars in upon us that it was time for maybe just a generic update of some kind. With some fun visuals as always. I hate that I think of great things to share and write about and then loose them in the chaos of so little time in my life. So here is what I got today ... and for now its all I got to give to you my dear blog ...



Ill start with yours truly. This is a ginger wasabi flower I made back on the day I turned another year older and wiser while at happy sumo eating sushi with the love of my life. I am well. Cultivating floral creativity as always and enjoying the editorial job that UBB continues to be. But nox is really what has me engaged, engaged in love. I cant get enough of what it is to be a new mom again and how different it is this time around. I recently battled mastitis, a scary thing for us given my previous history, but got over it relatively well and am so proud to say that through the stress and difficulties surrounding breast feeding I am still at it! A huge feat in my opinion! Other than that I am just managing the usual obligations, requirements, stresses, and schedules of my unique and amazing family.



This is the most current picture of Nate I can find. Confused ... well I dont really see the man to get a pic of him! But I bet you wish I could because the "dude" has lost nearly 30 lbs and is sleek and yoked up! Yep thats right you read that right. You see all it took was this .... a competition. Engage him in a little competitiveness in the way of a biggest looser comp among his high-school friends and he will kick trash no doubt, and of course win at all costs!

Aside from his usual time at home now being stolen by the gym and the biggest looser comp he is occupied as usual this time of year with wrestling and all that it requires of him as a coach and USA employee. Gone a lot. But what can I say, it is his passion!



Storie has been busy as ever being a "tween" and turning 12! She had 3 full days of celebration and fun! Starting with a Saturday out on the mall with who else but her birthday twin Mattea! For those of you that dont know Storie and Mattea were born on the same day in the same hospital to moms who have been friends since elementary school! The girls played bigger and better courtesy of Jamie and shopped till we all almost dropped. And we enjoyed a bit of Asian cuisine at PF Changs. We topped the night off with bowls of fattening and delicious ice-cream. Their own little birthday date!



Stories was "dying" for a friend party. She has not had one in several years. Her lazy mom thinks its too much work and cant keep her perfectionism at bay to keep it all within a reasonable price. Anyhow I gave in this year so a few days later I took Storie and a group of her friends to the mall {again} for a scavenger hunt. And we had a BLAST of a time. Epic tweener BDay party if I do say so myself. They had to find people, products, or services and take images of them to complete the hunt. Things like a member of the group in a highchair at the food court, or wearing all animal print. Or like in this pic finding a couple holding hands and asking for a pic with them. How cute is it that they picked THIS couple. It melted my heart. We finished the hunt off with some shopping for jewelery at Forever 21 and lunch at Spaghetti factory.



Then her actual birthday finally arrived and we did something ubber special! When I turned 12 I couldnt wait to go to the temple, so on my actual Bday I was able to go to baptisms for the dead. I had told storie this years ago and since then it has been a goal of hers. I cannot believe she is now 12 and old enough to go to the temple but I am so grateful that she is worthy and that her testimony and understanding are so much deeper than mine at that age. So Nate and I accompanied her to the Provo temple for a spiritual experience never to be forgotten. I observed while Storie and Nate performed baptisms for two deceased sisters anxiously waiting for this day.

She is still busy busy busy with swim team, meets, violin, and snowboarding!

I bet Stocktons occupations and accomplishments will come at no surprise ...


He continues to sharpen his athletic wrestling skills with the work out schedule of a pro-athlete and a tournament schedule that has him in a different part of the country every weekend. I have been able to watch a little more this year. Still makes me sick but I see the necessity in this as a parent. And I have even come to realize that in certain moments it was crucial for the balance between nate and stock for me to be there. I feel that we have grown closer and I enjoy his sweet little man spirit.



Our little Jae bird. Saylor is doing well and for the most part her health is stable. She has struggled with a few little colds that hit a respiratory challenge and she is working with the new changes that come with her new stoma. More than anything we have come to realize the pain of what is emotional pain rather than physical. I always knew that this would be the hard part for me as her mom. From birth it was what scared me most. Not to say the physical challenge of the body, her body, is not hard, it most certainly is. But I feel so capable of that and she seems likewise. The emotion that comes with more awareness and acknowledgement and the progression of life hurts deeply. Unlike the physical I have no idea how to help her navigate this nor how to even help myself. We fly by the seat of our pants I suppose.




as in years past Skiing is the highlight of saylors wihttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gifnter existence! Thanks to Wasatch Adaptive Sports! Amelia has become one of her best friends and a source for conversation that she likely will not have with anyone else. I am so grateful for the spirit and character behind WAS and who these people are and what they do for her. She looks forward to it like it is disney land. But in this funny quiet manner. her shyness i suppose. As some of you may already know, a documentary producer is putting together a turning point episode together about WAS and saylor will be included in that documentary. Cant wait to see. In addition to that she is getting pumped for the steve young ski classic here in a few weeks and cant wait to "race" someone!



How hilarious is this pic!? oh love this kid. He is almost 6 months old now. It has gone by so fast and I just sometimes want to stop time so badly. With the exception of the still difficult beyond belief nights! Remember when i said he was in the crib? well no more, he has reverted back to his old ways. My inability to let him suffer I am sure is the conduit. Doing well though, healthy for the most part. He is just now suffering from his first cold and it seems to be staying mild, uncomfortable but mild. He is the light of every day for every one of us. We miss him most when apart and his personality makes us all fill with joy! I cant imagine how empty we would be without him! A flirt, a comedy, a smile, a good giggle, he is all this and more {most of the time}. Quirks about him, his little hump move he does to wiggle himself out of things he doesnt want to be in! ahhh it is so funny! The fact that he will laugh at, with, and about anything! His lashes are getting longer and his eyes a more crisp blue. And his body is a chubby happy richness of baby that cannot be resisted.

nox 4 months

This is my fav pic of the lot .... see the faucet of water streaming out of this kids mouth, he really is like that. A drooling machine! You would think he was teething or something but in all honesty he has been like this since almost the beginning, so I highly doubt it is that, teeth have yet to break through!

I stopped by my dear friend Angies {sweet memory garden} house right before her big surgery and she captured a few 4 month old shots for me. Now that Nox is 5 months old i am just getting to posting them!!!

He is changing super fast, as babies do!!



He weighs in at about 16 lbs these days and 25 in long. He is proven to be for the most part pretty healthy and I think a good deal of that is attributed to the Synagis shots he gets considering that there have been a few battles with colds in our house and he has yet to fight one himself. For such a rough start he is fairing out pretty well.

I actually am pretty delighted in the mold that he has turned out to be. Nate obviously has extraordinarily dominate genes and together we make pretty much one type of kid as far as looks go, and I kind of like it that way! Who wouldn't want a kid with amazing blue eyes, forever long dark lashes, perfect skin and blond hair?!!!



A few facts about this fun little sir ...

Just like in this pic he loves his hands, always clasping them and molding them, fascinated by their existence.

He smiles A LOT! and laughs a ton too. I have never had a baby or seen a baby this smiley and giggly so early on and consistently. He will go on laughing fits, real true laugh out loud types. And he smiles often and easily. He seems to be happy nearly all the time. Its so rewarding and draws people including us to him. We just want to be with him all of the time.

He has finally made the transition to his crib in his own room! Yipeeee! this has been going on for a few weeks now so i think its safe to announce. that being said he still gets up a few times in the night. some nights are better than others.

He eats like a champ and he is eating baby cereals and fruit already. I know i know some of you are going WHAT!?! isnt it too early? well thats relative and up to personal opinion and debate. After some research we decided to start feeding him at 3 months. and you know what, he eats better than my other kids did at 6 months! he is hungry!

He likes us the most, he rarely will go to someone else without crying. He primarily likes to be with one of us immediate family folks. On occasion he likes to hang with a few of nates wrestling peeps and he laughs non stop at my brother joey. there really hasnt been much need to leave him behind much what with storie and stock in our lives and around. even saylor does a lot of assisting. ahhh the benefits of the gap!

I absolutely love being a new mom again and everyday i look into those big blue eyes with so much gratitude in my heart for this experience and for the journey that it was and has been and will be. i am so grateful for nate and his faith in me and what seemed like a crazy irresponsible plan. it all resulted in this little man, this amazing little man.

Sending 2011 out with a Texas size bang! {finale}

Its about time i finish this all up right!?
Day 2 in Dallas was really about just one person in our family {though we all enjoyed it!} It was about this man ...



Call me a romantic or what have you but i simply wanted to do something special for Nate, that he would know meant something. Its my own love language to be honest, and truth be told he probably does not even speak my language after all these years. But one can hope right? I can only barely understand his! But then the part of the brain that allows one to grasp a new language has always been underdeveloped in me. I knew from a few months back when the Cougs played at the Dallas Cowboys stadium that this stadium was one of a kind and kind of a big deal too. When Nate was a young lad, the Cowboys were his fav team. He doesnt seem to highly favor them much anymore but i do think in general the idea of them holds a special place in his little boy heart. So no way were we coming to Dallas without visiting "jerrys world"!




I have never myself been to an NFL stadium in my life, at least not that I recall. The magnitude is really something fantastic. Lights on the ceiling shaped like footballs in the VIP lounges, not a detail not thought of. An immaculate and clean stadium with level upon level upon level upon seemingly endless level. The largest big screen in the world, the picture hardly does it justice. Speakers the size of suburbans! and tribute ensembles fit to be artistic treasure.


Saylors fav part ... finding Michael J on the wall, her latest fascination.


the locker rooms were a delight it seemed, but i couldnt help thinking of the practical things like ... these are far too clean and structured to be the locker room to a group of grown men with sweaty gear! whatever ... It was a close to the athletes as we were going to get.


this just simply was not something that Nate would have been able to experience as a child, far out of the reach of his single mom upbringing, so it was especially charming to see stock really enjoy this and enjoy it with his dad!


The best part in my opinion, the field! I think everyone enjoyed this the most. We spent a good hour just running, playing, and taking it all in. Saylor especially liked collecting the turf rubber {great for a kid with a latex precaution right?!} ahhhh it was like taking sand in a jar home!

After leaving what would be a disney land of sorts for football we stopped by the Texas rangers stadium just a good rocks throw away. for a quick pic


and this moment marked our journey towards home. not a happy moment, but one of reluctance. Turns out we really liked the lonestar state! It was a shot of genuine Americana fun. The clues continued and we raced towards amarillo because i desperately wanted to visit here ...


Cadillac ranch, amarillo Texas. My kind of adventure. A modern art field with car canvas accessible to anyone! We sadly did not make it in time before night feel and the gates were closed. so my hopes and dreams flew out the odyssey window in the nights sky as we journeyed onward towards good old Albuquerque for another nights rest.

Our last day on the road was the first day of 2012 and brought a bit of disappointment as well. It seemed every stop a long the way left us desolate and bored.



Nate began teaching nox how to drive as his restlessness grew and we passed the great ship rock monument and ogled at its glory from afar. When we reached 4 corners, we discovered we were there on one of the only 3 days a year it was closed, so close yet so far. we werent the only idiots either. We had lunch at the gate and took our break anyhow. In which time over 20 cars pulled in.

In the end, the trip was that which i sought out for it to be. A time to create memories and experiences. Priceless moments of comedy and love. Back to reality and life as we know it.

Sending 2011 out with a Texas size bang! {day 5}

So there we were, driving down the Texas freeway towards ..... DALLAS! Of course Nate had figured out what was in store but the kids were not sure, though Stock had some ideas and had passed them along he wasnt entirely sure he was right {as if it would have been anything else in this bloody blue family}! This little jaunt was probably the biggest patience tester of the course, the kids were on their very worst behavior and we were tired. Might have been the only time i was feeling like a road trip was not a good idea, thank goodness it was a fleeting moment and i suppose we had to have at least one of them. We checked into Embassy suites late the evening of day 4 and I was delighted to crash into a bigger hotel room built for families!

I know what your all thinking .... boy were these two lads cut from the same mold ... i know i know!

Day 5 morning my kids read a clue about watching a battle and ensuring that we bleed blue, all with hopes of victory! and I dressed them in cougar duds. Bowl game destined we traveled in glee! A big shout out to the Thursday Heroes program that so graciously made this happen for our little family and brought us all pure delight.



Almost just as we arrived we ran into Cosmo, saylors used to be destined beau. He proposed immediately, she giggled, and he blushed. Too bad saylor has recently figured out that mascots are not at all real and that there is actually a person inside there! she has now resigned to not marry an actual cougar, she still thought it was fun.




I particularly was excited about the fact that the bowl game was the "armed forces bowl"! i have such a tender American spot in my heart for those that have and those that do fight for our freedom. We all had a good time hanging out in the REAL choppers used by our military, watching the parachute-rs drift down into the stadium, and the jets are always a sure fav!

The game was for the most part a bit disappointing, that is until the last 11 seconds when the game turned and adrenaline rushed. It was one of those moments in which you just would not want to miss the excitement. So proud of the cougs for turning things around and making magic happen!



Family pic at the stadium and stock in front of the doak walker statue. we traveled over to the after game concert featuring the "lt dan band" meaning GARY SINiSE ... you know CSI NY or otherwise known as LT Dan?!!! AHHH i personally love this guy so i was super excited to see him in real life ... too bad with 4 kids, one being a baby and another in a chair it was next to impossible to get anywhere near close enough to satisfy my curiosity. we arent much for concerts anyhow, we prefer a great sound system at home or in the car.

Off to dinner at one of our favs Cheesecake Factory, where i had perhaps the best dish i have ever had there! To the container store, somewhere i could spend hours in and a late night visit to the DALLAS T!